Do not hang out with Latin people

 Don't hang out with Latinos, they said.

When I began to make my process of immigrating to Australia a reality in 2019, I went to many agencies, spoke to some people who had traveled to Australia, and although I honestly did not find out, nor did I look for information about Australia, Sydney specifically because I wanted to discover it for myself. By the way I found a common advice from some study agencies, some friends and colleagues: Don't hang out with Latinos because “what nonsense to travel so far to continue with the same people”, “you're not going to learn English” , “you are only going to speak in Spanish” and blablabla. Well, at that time, to me it had sense and I was “clear and determined not to hang out with Latinos” and… oh surprise, at the Sydney college there were many Latinos studying English. 

Clearly you learn to speak English faster when you hang out with native speakers because you practice and speak constantly, but it's one thing to say it and another thing to live it and try to find local people because, just like us when we live with our community in our countries, they are also with their community and it is a difficult task to get into the Aussie culture.

When I arrived in Sydney I realized that not everything was rose color and that traveling to another country is very different from living in that country. I faced with a very painful loneliness, I remember feeling very empty and not wanting the next day because I felt depressed, not belonging, without a way out, I wanted to give up, it was a very strange feeling, I had to face alone the culture shock, the language, not having my parents who basically did everything for me, I didn't even do the groceries by myself. I didn't even know how to choose a fresh fruit in the supermarket, it sounds exaggerated but I was in a bubble and a comfort zone, I didn't have someone to ask me: How are you?, Do you want arepa with cheese?, Do you want coffee or agua de panela?, How was your day?, and all these positive comments from the family that make me feel important and feed my ego, and of course that is nice but at that time I had to learn to know myself from scratch, because I was not even aware of what I was feeling until I began to ask myself many questions, it was a wake up my soul but it is another story.

Fortunately for me, as I mentioned, where I studied there were Latinos, many who were going through the same thing, many with whom I could talk and identify, and there I also found my housemate and friend with whom we did everything together, we lived together, we shopped, we walked, we slept and hanged out in Hyde Park and we worked together, I think at that time I didn't know how to properly value her company, although I was in my existential crisis.

My friend and I got a job opportunity as cleaners and to my surprise in the cleaning company there was a group of Asians and a group of Latinos, specifically Latinas women. Well, these Latin women have welcomed me and my friend tremendously, I mean it, they literally gave us their hand when we felt most lonely, they made us part of their family, of their life, thanks to my Latin friends I had an incredible time and always I will remember them with a lot of love.

With my friends from work and other friends from the institute I felt comfortable and this helped the feeling of emptiness dissipate, the stay in Sydney began to be more bearable, more enjoyable. Additionally, the most beautiful thing is that there, I began to appreciate the Latin culture because before I did not have a sense of belonging to my culture.

It was incredible, it was like an awakening to my roots, to that joy that characterizes us Latinos, to that camaraderia, the gatherings and all these wonderful customs that we have and that feeling of not being alone because it is too easy to understand each other as Latinos. I'm not saying that we are all wonderful and that we had to get along, but you know what I mean.

My group of friends during the time I was in Sydney was made up of women of different ages and South American countries.

Venezuelans, they were like our mothers, they were the responsible of the group, the ones who prepared hallacas, pan de queso, arepas, and a lot of delicious food, these women invited me, opened their home doors to me, allowed me and my friends to share with their families, They welcomed, with hugs, with joy, with love.

The Chileans, oh yeah... locura y fiesta!, with them I knew it was a “cola de mono”, “un  completo”, “la guagua”, “el poto” and well an endless number of expressions that they have as if it were a language totally different from Spanish. With my Chilean friend I learned to accept and value my body, feel sexy and lower my complexes. She has the power to help you raise your self-esteem, to say, I want and I can, SOY LA PUTA AMA.

My Argentine friends, beautiful, with temperament, and feminists. With my friend I felt very much like myself, my friend was understanding, loving, we both shared many thoughts, we talked about life, personal growth, and although I didn't try mate, we shared healthy lifestyle habits, parties and the same musical taste, argentinian singers, Rock en español, and obviously reggaeton.

Mis paisanas Colombians of course, they nourished my soul, they gave me love, I learned with them that there is no absolute truth, that quality is better over quantity when it comes to friendships, to learn from the bad, to listen to myself and strengthen myself, with whom we share similarities, with who had sleepovers and watched movies, who I went out with and felt like I was with my family, was delicious. With whom I vent and who accompanied me in my moments of being sucky or sad and allowed me to be and feel.

My friends from Brazil, oh dear Brazilian friends, so kind, so warm, so fresh, so unconditional, I could tell someone that I needed something and they would instantly help me, I mean the camaraderie Brazilians is incredible, not to mention they know how to move that butt, their buttocks have a life of their own lol. Well, my friends from Brazil are extremely welcoming and always willing to make any plan, no matter how small. Obrigada to my beautiful friends from Brazil.

And well, not to mention friends from Mexico, Peru, Ecuador, such beautiful people and in the end with very similar customs, with similar feelings.

One day at the cleaning job, I was listening with my headphones a podcast of the historian Diana Uribe, she was talking about Christmas celebration in South America, and many things that she explained about food and traditions, I had experienced firsthand with my friends and It seemed amazing because I experienced it personally, it wasn't that I had read it in a book or seen it in something external. Then I valued the fact of hanging out and meeting Latinos, because it makes me appreciate my identity, my roots, realizing how similar we are, Latinos are paisanos, parceros, amigos, compinches, panas, cuates. 

Being far from our countries of origin, competition and comparison between Latinos has no relevance, here we are equal, we are resilient, friends, brothers and sisters.

In conclusion, I am very glad that I did not follow the advice of “don't hang out with Latinos”, life itself gave me these people to step on my pride, open my eyes and allow me to see the value of my identity, my ancestors, my history and my roots.

To my friends:

Thank you for bringing out the wild woman that lived in me, for dancing life with me, and for empowering us together.

And as Clarissa Pinkola says:

“Being ourselves causes us to end up exiled by many others. However, complying with what others want causes us to exile ourselves from ourselves.”

Con cariño:

Laura María